Midway Report

The Dallas Cowboys need help.

I just found an ad on Craigslist that reads: Coach Wanted!

1. Must be an order taker and willing to wipe owners eyeglasses clean when they get foggy. 
2. Must be willing to carry the label of "Coach" but know that most personnel decisions will be made by the incredibly egotistical owner. 
3. Must be willing to constantly have the owner look over your shoulder and be micro-managed on a daily basis. 
4. Please be aware that press conferences will be held side-by-side with the owner and you will always be required to speak with eloquence and great ambiguity while answering questions in a positive light no matter how gloomy things may actually be; all while never actually providing a solution to any problems. 
5. This job requires that you "talk the talk" FIRST while "walking the walk" is optional and experience is NOT necessary.

Watching the Cowboys each week gives me both a heart attack and a broken remote control by the end of each game.

The majority of people want to put the blame on Tony Romo; I on the other hand, choose to put the majority of the blame on Jason Garrett.

Ben Rogers of ESPNDallas.com put it best when describing Jason Garrett; "He's cold, robotic and calculated in an industry that is fueled by passion, testosterone and emotion."

WOW! Talk about the hitting the nail on the head!

Jason Garrett belongs in a boardroom holding ridiculous needless corporate meetings that only waste time and solve nothing. His demeanor and overall lack of head coaching experience make him a very ineffective head choke - uh um, I mean, head coach. 

He cant manage the clock.  He cant manage to call effective plays that lead to touchdowns once inside the 20 yard line.  He cant manage to keep a roster of healthy players.  He cant get a run game established on a consistent basis.  He cant seem to put his team in position to win and he cant manage to get his team to play with a sense of urgency while limiting mistakes, dropped passes, or penalties.

I recently came to the realization that watching the Cowboys is eerily similar to watching a monkey bone a football.

Yes, its true that Romo has 15 total turnovers second in the league only to the Chiefs Matt Cassel who has 16.  Truth be told, the majority of Romo's turnovers are a result of his receivers (mostly Dez Bryant) making stupid idiotic ridiculous mistakes, or Romo is just pressing in an effort to help his team come from behind to win. 

When playing from behind or tied for the lead he has 13 interceptions this year.  When the Cowboys have the lead he has ZERO interceptions.

The Cowboys could very well be undefeated or have only one loss if they had a tough mentality and a winning attitude about them.  The apparent lackthereof is directly attributed to the head coach.

So far, the opponents they have faced have a 61% winning percentage ranking 3rd in the league only behind the Broncos and Jets whose opponents have a 63% and 62% winning percentage respectively.

The good news: their remaining opponents have a 46% winning percentage and that number INCLUDES the Falcons in week 9 who have a 7-0 record. 

The weak remaining strength of schedule may help them get back on the winning side of things as long as they can avoid injury at key positions and eliminate their usual boneheaded mistakes that you typically find plaguing a JV football team as opposed to a professional team. 

Staying healthy and playing "sharper" while omitting untimely penalties, huge mental lapses, and dropped passes could play a huge role in them becoming a wild card team. 

This season may very well come down to them and Washington playing each other in week 17 for a chance to go to the playoffs.

The offseason needs to be spent trying to figure out how to add depth to this roster.  Somehow they keep bringing in guys who just cant stay healthy and there isn't much talent sitting behind the starters.

In other league news:

The Falcons are doing great - their record says so.  Amazingly they are doing well while ranking 27th in the league in rushing yards.  That's a testament to "Matty Ice" and his high-flying receiver corp.

The Eagles are playing terribly - their apparent mid-season QB controversy, -9 turnover ratio, and current 3 game losing streak says so.

The Falcons, Giants, Bears, and 49ers are the cream of the NFC crop with a definite drop-off between this group and the next best team.  The AFC seems to be headed up by the Patriots; followed by, well, the rest of the Conference.  The Texans and Ravens have the best records in the AFC at 6-1 and 5-2 respectively, but with major injuries for both teams at key positions on defense its tough to say either team CAN'T be beaten.  The Broncos are the clear-cut leader in the AFC West with a 4-3 record.  As the season wears on, Peyton Manning seems to be finding his stride.  Being down 24-0 at halftime to division rival San Diego on Monday night in week 6, only to come back and win 35-24, sure says a lot about Peyton Manning.

The Bears are my current favorite to win the NFC because they can throw, run, play defense, and last I checked Devin Hester is still a key cog of their special teams.  The Falcons look great, but haven't played anyone good; which is evident by their opponents combined record of 18-32.  That combined record includes one team with a winning record through 8 weeks (Broncos at 4-3).

Ultimately, I think the playoffs look something like this:

Bears, Giants, 49ers, Falcons are your division winners in the NFC.  The wildcard will come down to Green Bay, Seattle, Dallas, and Washington fighting to make the playoffs right up to the final week of the season. 

(Before anyone crucifies me; Dallas being in the playoff picture is 90% my heart and 10% my head talking.  My head tells me they have a soft remaining schedule and my heart is holding out hope).

Patriots, Steelers, Houston, Denver are the division winners in the AFC with Baltimore and Miami holding down the wild cards.  San Diego may get it together towards the last quarter of the year to overtake the Dolphins for the final wild card spot.

In the end, the Bears will face the Patriots in the Super Bowl:

Bears 33 Patriots 27

Robert Griffin III is doing great thanks in large part to his coach and the ability of said coach to put him in a position to do well.  Andrew Luck is playing admirably while leading all rookies in passing yards (2235) with so very little around him in comparison to RGIII.  Russell Wilson is showing that he has what it takes to be a franchise QB in a very tough NFC West with two 4th quarter comebacks so far this year (It would have been three 4th quarter comebacks if Braylon Edwards could catch at the end of the Cardinals game week 1).  Brandon Weeden is doing better than most people thought and Ryan Tannehill is sitting in the same boat as his team is a miraculous 4-3.  The record doesn't say much considering their opponents year-to-date are playing slightly below .500 football and they play in a division with the Patriots and two very lackluster teams in the Bills and the woeful Jets.

Doug Martin looks like he could be Ray Rice 2.0; however, after losing right guard Carl Nicks to a toe injury his abilities will really be tested going forward.  Sixth rounder Alfred Morris is running all over, through, and around opposing defenses while leading all rookie rushers and ranked third overall in the NFL in rushing yards (717).  In addition, very much in the mold of Ray Rice, this Redskin tailback is proving he can also catch the ball out of the backfield.

Unfortunately, the top RB taken in the draft, Trent Richardson, is ranked 4th among rookie rushers behind the two aforementioned running backs and rookie QB RGIII.  Its important to keep in mind that he is playing for a team whose receiving corps consists of the backup waterboy, a former Browns cheerleader who has only one arm, and former homeless man with the "golden voice" Ted Williams; while Brandon "Benjamin Button" Weeden quarterbacks this squad.  This sounds like the second coming of Steven Jackson - a workhorse back who will spend his entire career playing on a terrible team.

RGIII's college teammate at Baylor - Kendall Wright - is leading all rookies in receptions with 40 while ranking third in receiving yards (327) behind only his former teammate in college Josh Gordon with 379 yards and alone in second among rookies is Chris Givens of the Rams with 331 yards.

Its been a great start to the NFL season after having endured a few weeks of Scab referees and some controversial games as a result.  The league seems to be running on all cylinders at this point with some exciting new talent playing on both sides of the ball and even more exciting games week to week.

I cant wait to see what the second half will bring!

FIN

Be REFspectful….Not Another REF Story

I felt compelled to write a little something after this weekend of football.

I know you are thinking the constrain is coming from the utter debacle caused by the refs on Monday night between the Packers and the Seahawks, but you would be wrong.  Although, much like the rest of the NFL Nation, I was sickened by the end of the game, but I don't want to go on and on about it because, well, every other person on the planet is still talking about it on TV, radio, and around the water cooler.

The source of my intrigue actually comes from the football GAMES themselves; excluding the Footlocker employees disguised as referees.

With that said, it should be pointed out that although these refs are completely ruining the outcome of the games; they are actually good for the game. 

I know, I know, I can hear you already; "GOOD?  Are you crazy?" 

Well, simply put; even bad publicity is good publicity and despite the fact it's likely someone is going to get terribly hurt or teams are winning that should be losing, we all continue to talk about it and that is good for business.  The fans are threatening to stop watching football games, but that's not going to happen. Get real!  How could you possibly quit watching this sport we all waited 7 months to watch?  We are only three weeks into it and it has been a GREAT three weeks of football.  The best first three weeks I can remember.

The Thursday night games help to make the NFL weekend last juuuust a little longer. My wife isn't so happy about that, but I'm smiling ear to ear. Thanks to Time Warner Cable for finally adding the NFL Network to their lineup. You're the last major cable provider to do so. Welcome to 2012.

With three overtime games during the early match ups in week 3 and wrapping the day up with a last second kick by the Ravens to beat the former AFC Champion 31-30; you can't deny this was an edge-of-your-seat kind of Sunday.  We haven't seen anybody lose part of their ear in sports since the famed Tyson/Holyfield bout.  This past weekend had Matt Schaub lose an ear after a viscous blow by Joe Mays of Denver.  This was both gruesome and cool at the same time.  And, of course, let's not forget Monday and the "Inaccurate Reception."  We are still talking about Monday's game and its Wednesday already with the start of week 4 tomorrow night. 

The Saints have no wins in three games and no coach to help them win ANY games this season.  Good luck with "dat."  The Cardinals are undefeated having beaten a division rival, last years AFC Super Bowl representative, and the Eagles; who are the early favorite to win the NFC East - arguably one of the toughest divisions in football.  The Falcons look like the team to beat in the NFC so far.  At the same time the Texans are flying high at 3-0 in the AFC all while accruing the biggest point differential in the league at +46 (Not coincidentally, the Falcons also are +46).  Ten of the sixteen games in week 3 were decided by seven points or less.

Can't deny that excitement.

Kevin Kolb was benched in place of John Skelton to start the season only to replace Skelton after an injury and now Kolb has the third best passer rating in the NFL.  The much ballyhooed RGIII has had somewhat of an impressive start to his NFL career (although I am still not sold).  My favorite rookie QB, Russell Wilson, has led his team to a 2-1 start while throwing only one interception and quarterbacked his team to arguably one of the most famous fourth quarter comebacks in NFL history.  As a side note, his team could be 3-0 with TWO fourth quarter comebacks if Braylon Edwards could catch.  That would have put the Seahawks in first place and THEY would be 3-0 instead of Arizona. 

But, you can't talk about would'a, should'a, could'a.  Regardless, Russell Wilson STILL looks great in the first three weeks of his career and the sky is the limit for this kid.  Can't wait to see him grow in this league.

Andrew Luck has done pretty well in his first three games as well while ranking in the top 10 in the league in total passing yards with 846.  Of the rookie quarterbacks, I think it is safe to say that Luck doesn't quite have all the necessary weapons around him to make his job easy just yet, but he has still done admirably while only having one less win than last years squad season total only three weeks into the season.

Bottom line: the refs are bad, but the football is GREAT.  The ref situation will get worked out and then we can focus on how great these games have been.  There is still more than 75% of the season to be played and its promises to be a tremendous season in many different ways. 

Will RGIII continue to dazzle?  Will Andrew Luck more than double the Colts win total last season?  Will Russell Wilson continue to lead his stout team on fourth quarter comebacks on his way to Offensive Rookie of the Year?  Will someone let the Cowboys offense know the season started 3 weeks ago and will they decide to show up before the season is a total loss?  Can Matt Ryan and Julio Jones finally lead their team to their first Conference Championship since 1998?  Will Houston finally get off the snide and make a deep playoff run?

All this and more in the 2012/2013 season.  Sit down, buckle up and hang on cause its bound to be one hell of a ride!

FIN




 

What Good is a Ferrari GTO If You Cant Drive It?

I never thought that watching a NY Giants vs. Carolina Panthers game would actually shed so much light on the Dallas Cowboys.

After watching Eli and his Band of Backups completely annihilate the Panthers after a short week; I came to the realization that the problem with the Dallas Cowboys over the last decade is not with the product on the field, but the men standing on the sidelines and sitting in the box.

While watching Martellus Bennett rope in his 6th catch last night and score his 3rd touchdown of the year in as many games; I began to wonder why Dallas just released this man in the open market without getting something in return.  The guy is only 25 years old and clearly has loads of gas left in the tank.  He was a second round draft choice (#61 overall) for the Dallas Cowboys in 2008 and during his tenure with the Cowboys he had 85 catches and four total touchdowns with zero touchdowns in his final three years with the team.  Thus far, in his first 3 games with the Giants, he already has 15 catches (10 of those for first downs), 185yds receiving, and three touchdowns.

At 6'6" 265lbs., and a two sport athlete in college, this guy undeniably has some athletic ability.  He actually has the very same build as last years top fantasy tight end Rob Gronkowski. 

A two sport athlete in college certainly tells me there is some sheer athleticism that comes with this kid.  In addition to Marty B; Jimmy Graham, Tony Gonzalez, and Todd Heap - all top tight ends in the NFL - played basketball in college also.  There seems to be a trend to tight ends who have also played basketball in college and go on to play in the NFL.  Clearly, Jimmy Graham certainly wont be getting released anytime soon, Todd Heap is a solid player and 10+ year NFL veteran, while Tony Gonzalez will in arguably be a first ballot Hall of Famer. 

The point here is this: Why did the Cowboys "brass" let Martellus go without anything in trade?  Further, why did they let him go, PERIOD?

More and more teams are incorporating the two tight end set in the NFL.  Maybe that's because the Patriots had so much success with Rob Gronkowski and Aaron Hernandez playing on the field together that more teams want to emulate their success with their own versions of the two tight end set.  The use of this formation helps to neutralize the eight-man fronts against the run; not to mention the problems it creates in the passing game.  In addition, with these bigger tight ends, once you put these guys in motion and split them out wide it will inevitably create match up problems against the opposing teams secondary.

Why didn't Dallas do this with the future Hall of Famer Jason Witten and the 6'6" Martellus Bennett?  Dallas used Marty B primarily as a blocking tight end, but after watching his first three games this year it is clear he can catch, run routes, AND block.  What were they doing making him stay home to block?!

Did Bennett become dispensable because of the supposed "bond" between Jason Witten and Tony Romo?  Terrell Owens whined about their relationship and the hurt it put on his stat sheet.  Then Martellus Bennett was released and he proclaimed much of the same thing stating that Tony Romo seemingly played favorites.  Bennett eluded to the fact that Eli Manning looks for the open guy despite who you are or what your number is; thereby, essentially saying that Romo didn't throw him the ball because he doesn't wear #82.

This is where solid coaching comes into play.  It seems like the coaches and owner are stuck on the guys they pay big money to and they seem to forget about the other lesser paid guys on the roster.  I don't care how much you get paid, if you are on the roster you have a role in helping the team.  Let the players have a chance to help.  There is 11 guys on the field - USE ALL OF THEM!

The Cowboys just got their head handed to them in Seattle week 2 and coaches and players are pointing to lack of focus, lack of mental toughness, and lack of physicality. 

These things can all be attributed to lack of coaching.  We are talking about professional athletes here.  These guys eat, breathe, and sleep football but when it comes game time they puke all over themselves and cite lack of focus, lack of mental toughness, and lack of physicality?  Really?!

Why isn't the coaching staff preparing them better?  Why has the culture in Dallas been "flying high and mighty" one week; only to not show up to play the game the following week?  This is not an anomaly but a trend within the franchise.  They can seemingly sign stud players, but if the guys calling the shots don't know what to do with that talent then what good is that talent on this level?  You can go out and buy a Ferrari GTO with a manual transmission, but if you don't know how to drive a stick then what good is that car?  Truth is, it only looks pretty but it has no real function.

The Cowboys had Martellus Bennett - a former two sport athlete in college - whom they spent a 2nd round draft pick on and they primarily used him as a blocking tight end? SERIOUSLY?  Do these coaches Glenlivet on the job? The same guy goes to a division rival and after three weeks he already has 3 TD's on his stat sheet and is tied for 5th in the league in receptions.  Oddly enough, Jason Witten has more drops - FOUR - then Bennett has touchdowns - THREE!  That's both disappointing and embarrassing.

It comes down to coaches and general managers knowing how to put together a roster, and more so, knowing how to get the best out of each player each and every week.

Do you think Jason Garrett would have gone on the road to play an NFC team on a short week with a depleted offensive roster only to win 36-7 much like Tom Coughlin just did?  NO WAY! 

Jason Garrett can't even go on the road complete with a full offensive arsenal and win a game while coming off a HUGE win the week before AND 10 days rest. 

The fans, media, and arm-chair QBs alike all want to put the blame on Tony Romo.  They want to put the blame on lack of mental focus.  They want to blame lack of physicality.  No, no, no!  The blame falls on poor preparation and poor game planning. 

The inability to keep your team focused falls squarely on the coach and his counterparts who traverse the sidelines with him every Sunday.

You can't question the talent that has been on this roster over the last decade.  You can't deny that each offseason for at least the last 3-4 years prognosticators all clamor and profess their love of the Cowboys and the potential the team has for the upcoming season.  These things seem to be a constant.  The other constant is the fact that for the last 3-4 years the Cowboys fall short of the ultimate goal and high expectations.

Truth be told, the Cowboys are mediocre and its not due to lack of talent, but lack of knowing what to do with that talent.  They will continue to be mediocre until we get a game changing type coach on the sideline and a GM who can keep his butt in the box and his pen to the signature line on the paychecks each week.

For now the Dallas Cowboys are a Ferrari GTO, but the person behind the wheel is a 90 year old blind grandmother who hasn't driven a car in over 25 years.  Until we put a 25 year old high end executive behind the wheel with experience driving a manual transmission the Ferrari GTO will only look pretty sitting in the driveway and the rubber will never meet the road.

FIN

The Cold Hard Truth

 I dont care if the Cowboys are 1-1 along with more than half the league. I DO care that they look like the same "inconsistent" Cowboys that they have been for the past 10 years. Win one week. Lose the next. They had 10 days to prepare for Seattle and their rookie QB. STILL the same ol mental lapses, key dropped passes, fumbles, and just plain ol poor execution got the best of them. AGAIN. Sound familiar?

This is not an anomoly, but a trend. Year after year it is the very same thing. We, as fans, hope and pray for the best each offseason only to get the same product on the field year in and year out. I was a fan when they were 1-15 and I will remain a fan for the rest of my life. However, I am tired of nothing changing. I am tired of the same preseason high hopes only to produce the same "inconsistent" product come gameday. This team needs to look themselves in the mirror and ask why they are playing football and learn to come out week in and week out with greater CONSISTENT effort and limited mental mistakes.

Lets look at the Seattle game: Romo threw 40 balls and only one TD. He was barely over 50% completion while DeMarco Murray ran for 44 yards and we only scored seven points on offense. Now, some may argue that we couldn't get a run game going because we started out in the hole 10-0 pretty quick. Well, that is exactly my point. Good teams dont do that and good teams can overcome those mishaps. Good teams are able to overcome a deficit and have enough gas left in the tank to finish in the fourth quarter. Good teams are on the other end of things where they capitalize on the mistakes thier foe makes. Unfortunately, it always seems that we are the ones being capitalized on; not the ones doing the capitalization. Thus, we are sitting around come playoff time counting down the days until the preseason begins. In addition, where the heck is Felix Jones? Can someone tell him football season began and we need him. PLEASE! Felix Jones seems to be the epitome of what is wrong with this team. Here is a guy who we all had high hopes for and at least I expected him to be a franchise back who we could rely on to make big plays. Well, I was wrong. Dead wrong! The next thing I know, he fails his conditioning test this year and then he is completely absent for the first two games of the year while starting us off in Seattle with an opening kickoff fumble. REALLY?!?! C'MON, MAN! Another mark of inconsistency is Witten and Austin each had 10 targets but they only had five catches and four catches respectively. Look, I understand Seattle has a decent team and we were playing in one of the tougest venues in the NFL; however, Austin and Witten need to be consistent in their play and catching half of the balls thrown your direction is not acceptable. We look to these guys to move the ball on offense not stymie the offense. Dez Bryant; 3 catches on 7 targets? This wont work for us. Seattle may be improved but they cant be THAT good, can they? We had 10 days to prepare for them. We have to learn to win games and act like we have "been there before" not come out the week after a win with a proverbial hangover. That doesnt cut it in the NFL. Ten total drives and not one of them could get us inside the redzone? Unacceptable.

Bottom line is this: we committed two turnovers to Seattles NONE. We cant continue on this same path and expect to win games. The schedule makers made it tough on us this year and this coming week will prove to be no simple task. Although our secondary is inarguably greatly improved (Thank the good Lord!) but there are still the little things we need to improve on. These are the very same "little things" that we have been consistently lacking for seemingly the last decade. The mental makeup of this team MUST improve. I'm tired of all the lockerroom talk and not consistently showing up on the field when it really counts.

Please dont mistake this rant as my proclamation that the "sky is falling." Being 1-1 is not cause for panic. YET. But, bear in mind that the Eagles are 2-0, the Eagles beat the Holy Mother Mary out of us TWICE last year, and we cant fall too far behind them if we want to make the playoffs. I am simply stating that it only took two games into the season to show how inconsistent we can be while coming off a HUGE win in the Meadowlands. Disappointing! We have all seen this before, folks. We know how this story ends. This is not how we make it to the playoffs and if someone doesnt quickly right this ship, produce some consistent offensive,defensive, & special teams plays, and come out ON TOP of the turnover battle; then we will be the very same mediocre 8-8 team that we have been since the late 90's.

I am convinced that the upcoming Bucs game will be a great gauge of how we can expect this season to finish. If we come out strong, score some points against an improved Buccaneer team, and do the "little things" right; I think we can expect a playoff season. If we look like we did last week; unprepared, unfocused, and full of mental lapses then we might as well start talking about the 2013 draft and devising ways to impeach Mr. Jerry Jones.

FIN

 

 

What Does the 2012 NFL Season Have in Store?

Another season is upon us and that means it's time to lay down some general assessments.

Of course, I must start by voicing my opinion on the beloved Dallas Cowboys.  When I think of the Cowboys the first word that comes to mind is "injuries."  Injuries are always a worry in the NFL, but this year has not started off well for the Cowboys on the injury front.  Heading into tomorrow nights opener against the Giants there are already 14 people listed on the injury report. 

Its week 1, people!!!!!!!

Most notably, Jason Witten with a busted spleen and now Jay Ratliff has a high ankle sprain.  Terrific!  Of course, Miles Austin is listed on the injury report - Miles listed on the injury report is the same as an Al-Qaeda member being listed on the FBI's Most Wanted List; there will never come a day when they are not listed on there.  I feel strongly that Dez Bryant will have a breakout year and I just pray he doesn't get the Miles Austin Disease where he blows up the stat sheet through two weeks only to spend the rest of the season hanging out in the training room.  Not sure if Miles' hamstrings are actually made of wet noodles or if he truly has real muscle in those legs.  I am sick and tired of his injuries.  I think the guy has some talent on the field but once he steps foot on the field his next step tends to be into the training room.  He is not worth the trouble nor the band aids at this point and I think the Cowboy should trade him away and get a high pick so they can take a REAL wide receiver like Marquis Lee or Robert Woods in next years draft.

I am tired of the injuries they are having to endure at key positions since the OTA's have started. I am not sure why they are struggling with them, but if this carries over to the regular season we are screwed. Any fan that doesn't have some type of concern about the injuries is delusional, drunk, or both.  I realize that this is football and with football comes injuries, I get that.  However, they moved up in the draft to pick a guy who was wearing a cast for the first 2/3 of the off season only to then get hurt again.

I just wonder if the decision makers for the Cowboys ever look at doctors reports before they draft someone, or maybe they just use "the force."  Last year they drafted someone coming off ACL surgery who they knew would never be ready to take the field before mid-season - they drafted him anyway.  IN THE SECOND ROUND!!!!  They drafted a running back who had a HUGE tendency to get hurt in college, he comes on the scene in the NFL with guns blazing - GREAT - then he breaks his leg after about 6 games.  NOT great.

I am not going to go on and on about their apparent inability to draft guys who can stay on the field, but it is reason for concern.  BIG CONCERN!  The Cowboys have an early bye week which means that come December, this team may be struggling to have enough gas left in their tank to finish the season.  What else is new?!?!

Poor Tony Romo will have to unfairly bear the brunt of that cross.  Not the coaching staff nor the hodge-podge offensive line.  Tony Romo is the very VERY least of the Cowboys problems and anyone who wants to point the finger at him either doesn't watch the Cowboys play, EVER, or they simply just don't know Jack about the game.

Heading into the season the issues lie with the offensive line along with the apparent propensity for injuries they have on both sides of the ball.  I'm hoping Jason Garrett has taught himself how to call offensive plays inside the red zone this off season.  Otherwise, that will be YET another issue for them as they struggle to keep up with high-powered offenses in the NFL while kicking fg's.  The defense has been shored up.  I feel incredibly confident that the defense will finally be a strong point for them again.  I haven't seen a good defense in Dallas since Wade Phillips left.  Brandon Carr makes that secondary VERY good and hopefully, Morris Claiborn, aka, "Pick 6" will turn out to be everything they hoped for; although, I have my doubts.

I think the Cowboys can open up the season 4-0 if they can stay healthy at key positions.  If the Cowboys are at their best, I feel strongly they can end up at 10-6 this year and make the playoffs as a wild card.  Unfortunately, the Eagles are going to represent the NFC in the Super Bowl.  They have tons of talent on offense and defense, they are specifically designed to beat the Cowboys (see the 2011 season), and they have so much to play for this year with the death of Andy Reid's son.

I laugh at the people who are anointing RGIII as the second coming of Christ in Washington.  Hopefully, he has great financial advisers by his side that are banking all of his endorsement money.  I said it before and I will say it again, Kirk Cousins is the best QB in Washington and RGIII will be at your local Subway in three years asking what kind of bread you want with your $5 footlong.  I'm not hating on you, RGIII, I am only speaking the truth based on what I have seen of you in college.  You are simply not an NFL QB and your body has ZERO chance of holding up in this league with your style of play.  Can you say, Mike Vick 2.0?  The difference between RGIII and Mick Vick is that RGIII wont last nearly as long in the NFL.  Not to mention, RGIII loves his dog.

To HELL with the Giants!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  That is all I have to say about them.

Trent Richardson has a chance to become Adrian Peterson 2.0. Best of luck to you, Trent. I think you will have a tremendous career in the NFL even if you DO have two bad knees right now.

I am glad to see that Russell Wilson finally got his due and he is going to prove me right by showing the world he was the best QB in this draft.  Go Russell!!!  I believe in you!  As a side note, the Seahawks may actually win that division.  Ugh, maybe not.  After all, they are Seattle and nobody cares so what difference does it make?

John Skelton won the QB job in Arizona...I called that one, too.  Best of luck, John.  You have a chance to be one of the good ones.  Don't blow it!

The Bears win the NFC "Norris" Division.  Sorry, Packers fans.

Tim Tebow will start for the Jets by week 7 and lead them to an 8-2 record under his leadership.  Sanchez is a horrible QB and will likely be wearing a headset in the McDonald's drive-thru asking if you want to super-size your order next year.

The Dolphins will be [are] the laughing stock of the NFL this year and the Bills will be better, but their coach is horrible so they wont amount to much.  That leaves the Patriots in the AFC East and ultimately they will be leading the charge to the Super Bowl in the AFC this year.  They are the "Patriots" and as long as Tom Brady and Belichick are running the ship they will always be a force to be reckoned with.

My final thought: PAY THE REFEREES!  PLEASE!  These scab refs are an embarrassment.  The game cannot go on with these fools patrolling the field.  They are a joke.  Guys are going to get hurt with them calling the game and the Cowboys don't need anymore help in that category.  Games will be won or lost based on calls these guys make, or more accurately; calls they miss.  It's going to cheapen the game we have all waited 8 months to watch and the fans deserve to watch the best product possible. I cannot say that any more emphatically.  Whatever the issue is here, you need to get it squared away so we can watch some real football.  These former lingerie football and JV football refs are a sorry excuse for a referee.  They should be working with RGIII and Mark Sanchez on how to run a local fast food franchise.  They are WAY over their head in the NFL and if Roger Goodell knows whats good for him he will do whatever it takes to make it right.

GO COWBOYS!

FIN

Cause I said so....

One last thought of the day.

First, I should make it clear that I am not a fan of the NBA since Jordan left the Bulls with his 6 rings in tow.  I just cant sit around and watch these overpaid whiners play basketball.  I have to know when it became legal to take 3 - and sometimes even 4 steps - without it being called a travel violation and if I played defense the way these guys play defense I would have been kicked off my junior varsity basketball team.  Its pretty pathetic.

With that being said, I think this years Finals is intriguing.  You have one of the greatest NON-clutch players in the history of the game going against one of the best up-and-coming players we have seen since, well, the aforementioned NON-clutch player.

Its @KingJames vs. @KDTrey5.  The King vs. the Kid.  The 3 time MVP vs the 3 time league scoring champ.  There are many side stories, but none as big as the team's two marquee players in search of their first ring.

I have said it before and I will say it again: 5 guys should be able to beat 3 guys on the hardwood.

I love to see young teams dominate.  Its fun.  Its why I watch sports.  I love to be able to watch the "next great thing." 

The Thunder are young, hungry, driven, and they do it rather quietly in a town that isn't known for its professional sports franchises, but rather their college football team.  They show up to press conferences with backpacks and retro glasses without lenses.  They show up to work without pouting, whining, crying, complaining, or holding out.  They don't shout their glory from mountains high or hold ticker tape parades BEFORE they ever get a chance to hoist a trophy.  They are just a team who does what they are paid to do.  They work together.  They practice hard and play harder.  They are young and unafraid.  They conquered a very experienced team with the NBA's best record and longest win streak in the Western Conf. Finals.  They win on the road and they are undefeated at home during the playoffs.  They pass the ball and they play defense.  Their coach looks more like a financial planner than an NBA coach.

OKC is an unbelievable college basketball team with NBA bank accounts and Bentleys.  They have an underrated coach who knows how to make adjustments and motivate his team.  They play the game the way it should be played and they do it with great energy in an aptly named building, Chesapeake Energy Arena.  They play with something the NBA is missing - HEART.

I will root wildly for the Thunder to quell the Heat.  I like the Thunder in 7 and I thought I would shout it from my chair upon the World Wide Web.

FIN

US Open at Olympic Club

So, here we are.  The week of the famed US Open.  This year the Tour will take us to the Olympic Club in San Francisco, CA.  The weather indicates we will have a beautiful sunny four days which should make the greens fast and true.  Getting the ball to hold the green this week will be a lot like trying to make a marble sit still on a slightly tilted granite floor .  I have a feeling that red numbers will most certainly be hard to come by.

Which leads me to my next question: Will Tiger win his first major after a 4 year drought?

Who knows?  At this stage in his "comeback" do we really have any idea?  He sinks impossible greenside chips one week to win and misses the cut the next. Its like trying to answer the question; why do they have braille on ATM drive-thrus?  Why do your feet smell and your nose run?

We just don't know and - truth be told - isn't that why we watch sports?  Isn't that what makes sports so great?  Before his transgressions we knew who was going to win the tournaments he entered.  Vegas' line would tell it all - Tiger, or the field?  The real question was simply; by how much will he destroy the field? 

Today, we wonder: will he win?  Will he make the cut?  Will he get a top 10 finish, or will he even make the top 40?

What we do know is this: Tiger is GREAT for golf!  Golf needs Tiger more than Tiger needs golf and for that very reason we will all be watching intently to see how he makes out at this years US Open.

We also know that he led the field in GIR and fairways hit at the Memorial and he will need to do that again here at the Olympic Club.  The fairways are more narrow than the hallways in an Oompaloompa's house and the greens are surrounded by more sand than a Pacific island.  Accuracy is important this week but not as important as it is for him to stay calm.

His nerves will need to be steady but not as steady as his putter.  On Tour so far this year, he is ranked 150th on putts from 10-15',  74th of putts from 5-15', and 41st on putts from less than five feet.  NOT GOOD!  Certainly not the mark of a Champion.  With only 117 birdies to date, he is ranked 143rd.  He must start sinking putts on a more consistent basis in order to look more like the Tiger of old.

We all know his putter has been a little "off" so far this year, but what better time to change that around than at this years second major? 

Red numbers will most certainly be difficult for all this week and that is why getting to the green should be the number 1 priority for the entire field.  Once on the green, I feel confident the putting will come; however, after looking at the flyovers of all the holes finding the green could be similar to finding the Great White Elephant.

You've got a 247yd par 3 , a 520yd par 4, and a 670yd par 5.  Not to mention, this course has more doglegs than Cesar Milan's kennel.

The US Open is meant to be tough and this week will certainly holdup to the expectation.  The last major Tiger won was the US Open in California and this Open is also in California.  He is coming off yet another historic win and has all the momentum in the world behind him after winning two tourneys in less than three months.  He has got to maintain that fire that you saw after he sank the chip on 16 of the Memorial and burn up the rest of the field. I can see him pulling off a win this week and I can also see him pulling his drive into the trees and donning a noisy spectator with a new Nike graphite necklace.  We will watch for the unknown.  We will wait with baited breath for Sunday at the Open and we will root like hell for the man that once was to reappear at the top of the leader board heading into the final round.

Happy Fathers Day to Dads everywhere and good luck to our beloved Tiger.

FIN

A Letter to Mr. Jenkins

Dear Mike,

So, I hear that you are planning to hold out of OTA's and you want a trade.  Really?  I must say that you have been in the league a total of four less-than-stellar years and now suddenly you think you have the right to holdout on the team? 

Disappointing!

In the four years you have been in the league you have made one Pro Bowl, started all 16 games only twice out of your four short years in the league, and your production has dropped off each of the last two years.  Last year, the Cowboys secondary couldn't cover a dead bug and you think you have the right to holdout this year?  Listen, Mike, you had one pick last year with only 24 tackles in only 12 games; this was your worst production since your rookie year.  The secondary was seemingly the primary reason for the team's drop off last year which ultimately cost your team the division title and the playoffs.

THIS INCLUDES YOU! 

I can't understand how you can possibly feel a sense of entitlement after you have done...well, NOTHING!!  You have never been someone who provided much run support and the most INTs you ever had in a season is five.  Since then, you have had one pick in each of the last two years.

So the team brought in some secondary help via the draft and free agency and now you wanna cry, stomp your feet, and quit on the team?  Who do you think you are, Albert Haynesworth?  C'MON!

Winners rise to the occasion and stare a challenge in the face not go to bed and pull the covers over their head.  Nobody said you were going to be cut from the team; the team just brought in some players to create some competition and add some depth to an otherwise swiss cheese secondary. 

Last night I made some macaroni and cheese and asked my wife to hand me the strainer so I could drain the water; she told me I should just use the Dallas Cowboy secondary instead of the strainer.

Let me clue you in on something, Mike: Teams get better by adding depth to their roster thus creating competition.  That's how teams grow stronger.  That's how teams make it to the Super Bowl.   

Instead of using this to make yourself better you want to stick your head in the sand? You're like Lebron James in the fourth quarter...you're wilting away like a dead flower.

This is what is wrong with the Cowboys as a whole.  Certain players think they are the best thing since the invention of beer and wine, and when posed with a challenge you decide not to show up.  Good thinking!  That makes you look REEEAAL good to the other 31 teams in the NFL, Mike.  I wouldn't want someone who avoids a little competition and I am sure the other 31 teams in NFL don't want someone like that either.

I can see you on a job interview now with your highly mediocre resume in hand: 

"Mr. Jenkins, when posed with a challenge, how do you typically respond?"

"Well, first, I cry a little. Then when I run out of tissues I usually like to threaten to quit my job if things aren't done my way.  Finally, when nobody listens to me, I typically enjoy not showing up to work at all." 

"Thank you, Mr. Jenkins.  NEXT!"

I cant help but ask, Mike, do you pee sitting down? 

Man-Up, find your sac, and get your butt to work where you belong.  The team needs you.  This is where you got your start in the NFL and if you really think you are deserving of being a holdout why don't you show up to camp and let everyone see what you are actually capable of.  Here's an idea, stay healthy for a whole year.

Yeah, I get it - you were hurt for much of last year and still did what you could to stay on the field despite your injury.  Congratulations!  That's the equivalent of me telling my boss I should get a raise because I came to work even though I had a cold for a week.  Big Deal!!  Who cares!  Your supposed to do that.  ITS YOUR JOB!  You automatically assume that responsibility when you accept your job.

With the attitude you are showing everyone I would rather have Helen Keller take your spot.  I know she can't see but she probably has a better sense of smell so she can just use her nose to find the ball. 

You are part of a "team." Act like it! 

Being in the NFL is a privilege; not a right.  You are entitled to NOTHING and you need to show that you have what it takes to make it in the NFL before you "take your ball and go home" just cause things didn't quite go the way you want them to.

Get to camp.  Show "pick 6" what its like to play corner in the NFL and help the team win a Championship.  Nobody likes a quitter.  If you want to whine, cry, stomp your feet, and create a feud then we will work on getting you a part on the Real Housewives of Dallas.

Otherwise, this is football; show us you got a pair and get to work!!

Signed,

SikandTiredof UrOvrInflatedViewofUrself

2012 Post Draft Thoughts

With the 2012 draft behind us and young athletes dreams having been realized; I thought it was time for the SportsT4nk to storm back onto the scene with some judgements and considerations.

First, we must address the obvious: The Cowboys.

Long story short; I give them a draft grade of B.  I never thought they would draft Morris Claiborne because I thought he would never be there at 14 and I never thought they would trade up 8 spots to get him, so he was not someone that I even considered as an addition to a very inept secondary.  Truth be told, I was clamoring for Mark Barron...you're welcome Tampon Bay!!!

Short story longer; I am a cautiously optimistic about this pick.  I think he has potential to be a great defensive back in this league for years to come, but "potential" never won me nothin.  "Potential" is merely an unopened beer; it wont tickle your taste buds and it sure wont get your drunk. 

It just concerns me slightly that they moved up 8 spots and gave up a second round pick to draft someone who is coming off wrist surgery, is wearing a cast on his hand as we speak, and wont even be able to participate in rookie training camp which opens up this weekend.  He likely wont even be able to participate until the full training camp opens this July.  Not to mention, the Wonderlic test.  Do I care that the kid got a 4 on the test?  NO!  No, I do not.  Not at all.  What does concern me is the fact that he said to himself, "Well, I know I am expected to take this test along with every other rookie prospect, but i don't feel like it.  Nah.  It doesn't ask one football question and it says NOTHING about who I am nor how I play football so I don't think I'm gonna take this stupid-ass test."  Now, not that I think the Wonderlic is important, but its the "attitude" he has that made him decide not to put forth any effort that concerns me.

I feel that very attitude translates to not wanting to study game film.  Not wanting to participate in team meetings.  And, eventually not wanting to listen to coaches because he feels he is 'Above the Law.'  I don't know that this will be how he carries himself as a professional football player, but in my best estimation this is definite cause for concern.  Especially, when the all-too-egotistical and "lazy" Dez Bryant sits in the same locker room.  Do me a favor Jason Garrett, don't put their lockers beside each other and don't let their pompous attitudes become a standard in your underachieving locker room.  Thanks!

In 2011 the Cowboys secondary couldn't cover a dead bug, but one other glaring issue was their overall attitude.  The team as whole seemed to have a sense of entitlement which was brought on by the high expectations of the fans, media,coaching staff, and the idiot owner.  I think they need high character guys who are concerned with putting forth effort, practicing hard, and maintaining a high level of conditioning while operating as a "team."

With all that said, THEREIN lies my cautious optimism with the #6 pick in this years draft.  God Speed, young Morris Claiborne....GOD SPEED, my son.  I'm rooting for you.

Other than the obvious BIG NAME pick in this years draft there were a few other guys that I am rather hopeful for.  One guy who was on my draft board that we actually took was Kyle Wilber from Wake Forest.  I like his size and he seems to fit well within the 3-4 scheme.  He isn't much of a pass rusher but he is a run stuffer and should be able to cover pretty well underneath.  I think he helps create a lot of competition at the linebacker position and he will hopefully have some production as a Cowboy.

I like the "value" we got with Safety Matt Johnson from Eastern Washington.  This guy is big, fast, and had 17 interceptions while in college.  Its too early to truly tell, but I feel pound-for-pound that he is the best pick we had that wasn't an undrafted free agent.  The guy can cover, hit, and should be a starter for us within the next year or two.  I think he has the great character that Morris Claiborne apparently lacks and that should translate into a future defensive leader.  My only concern is a torn bicep that he endured in his college career, but hopefully that doesn't mean he has a penchant for injuries.

Between the last two draft years I almost feel as though the Cowboys have drafted FAR TOO MANY players who seem to spend more time in the trainers room than the trainers themselves.

We may have grabbed some undrafted free agents that could prove to be true assets to the team at some point in the future.  I would have absolutely been smitten with CB Eddie Whitley from Va Tech if he didn't tear his ACL.  The kid can cover and play multiple positions in the secondary, he is tall, fast, and knows how to defend, BUT I don't like that kind of injury. Running back Lance Dunbar might be an interesting project out of North Texas, but the guy who I think was the very best pick in the draft was Adrian Hamilton from Prairie View A&M. 

This guy had unbelievable stats in college and he looks great on film.  I realize he is from a small school but you cant deny his stats and he may be the guy that Anthony Spencer never was.  Without a doubt, I will be watching him VERY closely.

Hopefully, this draft proves to help grow the Dallas defense into the playoff contender they should have been last year.  If the defense fails miserably AGAIN this year it will be obvious that the problem lies with the fat, unshaven, unkempt D Coordinator.

As far as the rest of the league, congrats to the Browns for getting the future of the running back position in the NFL.  Now they just need to somehow acquire more weapons on offense so they don't wear him out like the Kardashians wear out "fake."  Shame on the Dolphins for drafting a one year starter at QB who happens to be a converted wide receiver with more blown leads in the fourth quarter in one year than any team in NFL franchise history with the 8th pick in the draft.  Don't worry Matt Moore, your job is safer than Bill Gates.  The Colts may have drafted a franchise QB but they so wildly dismantled this team in an effort to rebuild that it will take another 3-4 years for them to even be relevant again.  Speaking of relevance, the complete and utter debacle that is the Saints have successfully managed to become the "Aints" again for the next year or more.  Break out the brown bags.  I think the Eagles had a great draft and that upsets me because when you look at that roster loaded with talent; I feel they are primed to represent the NFC in the Super Bowl this year.  The Giants took David Wilson who I feel will be a good back along with Rueben Randle at wideout while Carolina stole WR Joe Adams in the late rounds.  The Rams did a great job finding a back to lessen the load on an aging and worn Steven Jackson in Isiah Pead and may have taken some key players to help on defense as well.  The Cardinals were smart to take Michael Floyd to compliment Fitz and I feel confident John Skelton will have a breakout year with the weapons he now has in the passing game.  He just needs Chris "Glass-Beanie" Wells to stay healthy.  I am ecstatic that the Redskins took RGIII since he is merely a great athlete but completely lacks the ability to be an NFL QB and will likely be taking your order at the Wendy's drive-thru within the next 3-4 years.  The ironic thing is that the best QB on the Redskins roster was drafted in the fourth round well after the coveted RGIII, his name is Kirk Cousins. 

Speaking of QB, Russell Wilson now rides on the Seahawk train and will have some time to sit behind Matt Flynn for a year (give or take 8 games) before he takes the NFL by storm.  Someone please tell me how the best QB in the draft never got picked up until round three?  Really?!?!  Am I the only person on the planet that knows how to conduct the trusty "eye test"?  Do these scouts, GM's, and NFL coaches watch football with their eyes open, or do they just use "The Force"?  This guy was overlooked due to his size, but nobody bothered to measure the size of his heart, his leadership ability, nor his love of the game.  Here's to you R. Dub!!  I BELIEVE!

Overall, I feel there was a tremendous infusion of talent into the NFL with this years draft class; more so than years past, and I think we are in store for an incredible season.  I firmly believe there will be a TON of parity this year and division leads will likely change from week to week.  I think it will come down to the final 2-3 weeks of the season before playoff teams are firmly locked in.  Many teams got better.  Many teams clearly recognized their flaws and necessarily improved one side of the ball over another through the draft (i.e. the Pats, Pack, and Cowboys).  And many teams will be in contention as the season draws to a close.  Many teams that most were not expecting.

Here's to football.  Here's to the Cowboys improved defense.  And here's to drinkin frosty cold ones while sittin on the couch on Sundays.  The season cant get here fast enough and the beer cant be cold enough for September 5th!

Go Cowboys!!!

FIN

HEEEEEEEE'S BAAAAAAAAAAACK

http://espn.go.com/golf/notebook/_/page/birdiesandbogeys120306/tiger-woods-honda-classic-62-hardly-burden-pressure
___________________________________________________________________________________

Dear Mr. SportsT4nk,

Did you send me this link because of this quote?

“He's the best player I've ever seen tee to green, period. I didn't have a chance to play with Tiger [in the] early to mid-2000s when Tiger was the man, but Rory McIlroy is the best … he's the best player I've ever seen. Like I say, as soon as he learned how to putt, he was going to be a dominating force, and you're starting to see that now. "

___________________________________________________________________________________

You RE-TARD!!  That wasn’t the article I sent you…it was about Tiger's "62" and how he did it with tons of pressure on him and he is on his way to prominence…AGAIN!!

I don’t know where you got that ridiculousness…but, NOW I am angry

Signed,
SportsT4nk
___________________________________________________________________________________

Dear Mr. SportsT4nk,

Try scrolling down on the article you sent me…

Besides, I loved the top part of the article…ANYONE that’s starts the final round 8 back has the weight of world on his shoulders to win….lol
___________________________________________________________________________________

Dear Mr. Get-A-Clue,

You are quite possibly the most unsmart man I ever met.  READ THE ARTICLE.  You just don’t understand sports…

Go back to listening to music sung by delusional, incredibly overzelous, washed up, horrible garage bands that will never go anywhere in life.

Signed,
WaySmarterthanYOU
___________________________________________________________________________________

Dear Mr. SportsT4nk,

“The only pressure we have, the only pressure that matters; is that which we put on ourselves.  Living up to our own expectations of ourselves should serve as the ultimate barometer of our success and happiness” – By; ME (I literally just made that up).

I think it’s hilarious how you “don’t read sports articles and form your own opinions based on your eye tests, blah, blah, blah” – yet you send me the article from someone ELSE writing that Tiger is back, blah, blah, blah” – Funny how that works, it’s amazing how you can just turn on and off your hypocrisy when it comes to “your” sports opinions. 

Like Sunday, you simply said Tiger “was back”, yet referenced the course they were playing and that the 3 hardest holes in golf still remained that day, thus implying Tiger could/might win…but then he didn’t..and the shut off valve came about…open valve, close valve…that’s you…

I’ll GLADLY listen to my garage band music, because I ENJOY it…it doesn’t matter whether or not they fill giant stadiums or arenas, it only matters that they make music they enjoy…(see first quote above) – and I happen to enjoy it too…all that matters…

Signed,
BigFanofColdplay

___________________________________________________________________________________

Dear Mr. You're Pissing Me Off,

Alright.  Good work.  Other than a teeney-boppin Justin Beiber lovin little girls, there is not one person on the entire planet who makes me as angry as you do.  I would reckon the big difference between you and the aforementioned is that she does it more frequently; not to mention, she has FAR better taste in music than you do…

Secondly, thank you for walking right into my trap!!!! 

SportsT4nk-1 You-0

Here is my train of thought:  I read an article that actually “echoed” my thoughts.  As per your email below, you actually stated that I ALREADY made the proclamation that Tiger is “Back.”  I sent you this article WITHOUT any subject line, without any explanation, without any real justifacation…just a link to an article.  That’s it.

I am trying to show you that you can’t just send links to articles without some kind of “caption.”  You just can’t do it; although, as we both know, you have tried to do it in the past.

If I were to send the article AS I NORMALLY WOULD – with a caption! – I would have noted that this article is written by a sportswriter who echoes my sentiments.  You seem to hang your proverbial hat on what sportswriters say and NOT SO MUCH what I say.  This guy said TIGER IS BACK AFTER I already made that proclamation by applying my faithful and fool-proof EYE TEST.  Further, if you recall, I sent you a text after ROUND 3 stating that Tiger is BACK only to have him come out in the final round and shoot a career best 62.  Now, if that doesn’t prove how brilliant and utterly fool proof my “EYE TEST” is; then I don’t know what else I can do.

In conclusion, it’s not about me being “hypocritical.” It’s simply a matter of me trying to appeal to YOUR senses by finding an article written by a sportswriter since you put so much faith in them when formulating your opinion instead of doing what I do and that is give them the trusty  ‘ol “eye test.”

I’m just trying to show you that EVEN THOUGH you absolutely REFUSE to give me any credit, EVER; it seems as though I DO know what I am talking about.  You just won’t admit it. 

Lastly, about a week ago you were kind enough to suggest some bands to check out on YouTube in an effort to clear thy head – that was quite nice of you. 

Now, this is an absolute TRUE story:  The very first band I looked at on my phone started playing, the wife was in the kitchen and yelled from the next room, “What the heck is that??!!…SHUT IT OFF,” at which point, I laughed hysterically and shut it off because I felt the same exact way.

That is all.

Ta ta for now!!

FIN
___________________________________________________________________________________

OMG, SportsT4nk…you’re SO right!!!!!!!

Tiger shot a "62" on Sunday and you were the ONLY TIGER FAN ON EARTH to say he’s back!!!!!  And THEN “echoed” by a sports writer?  OMG, sorry buddy, you rock!!!!

GREAT analysis and FIND on saying he’s back after the "62."  Thank the good lord that you told me on Sunday that he was back or else NO ONE would have…you receive FULL Credit…CONGRATS!

Just try not to trip over your Cape with the big “O” on it for Obvious, Captain.

HEY!!!! The other night I was watching the NBA…Kevin Durant is AMAZING….please wait until tomorrow when I forward you an article “echoing” that…STAY TUNED!!!!

As far as the bands…I like them, you don’t have to, my guess is you listened to one and then stopped…it’s the same thing with the Lady GaGa…I will never understand why a grown man would EVER listen to that garbage, but you do…

Ta-Ta
___________________________________________________________________________________

Dear Mr. Clearly Music is Not Your Forte-Either,

Are you REALLY this stupid???!?!!?!!?!?!?!!?!? 

Check Twitter.  20 million followers for Miss Gaga.  You dont have 20 million people following your fine sweet ass on Twitter UNLESS your beats are GOOOOOD!  PERIOD. 

Try looking in the mirror once in a while.  Maybe if THAT many people like her; PERHAPS, its YOU thats is the DamnedFOOL.

Now, as far as Our BELOVEDTIGER; I said SATURDAY that Tiger is back!!!  You cant deny my proof!

I proclaimed on SATURDAY – the day BEFORE – he shot his CAREER RECORD "62" that he is on his way….stop saying I told you AFTER it happened!!! Stop it!!  I told you BEFORE it happened by applying my FAIL PROOF EYE TEST.  I did it!!!  I did!!  Its true!!

You can make things up all you want in an effort to deny me any credit and slap me with your favorite label of Capt. “O”…go ahead. Deep down inside you know the REAL truth.  I know it.  You know I know it.  I know YOU know it….NOW, it is time that the world know it.

This email chain is going viral!!!!

FIN
___________________________________________________________________________________

Viral:

“Former greatest on golfer on earth comes back to play good golf” – Credit: SportsT4nk

World responds: “WOW, NO ONE saw that coming”

P.S. – after this chain, you better PRAY he wins once this year…because EVERY week he doesn’t win…I’m on you like white on rice, on a paper plate in a bowl of milk in a snow storm….
___________________________________________________________________________________

Dear Mr. I Cant Believe You're Still Talking,

Viral: “Former greatest golfer on earth comes back to play good golf” – Credit:SportsT4nk

World responds: “WOW, NO ONE saw that coming”

“NO ONE saw that coming”?  Are you kidding?  The WORLD has put him in a hand-basket on the road to being obsolete, archaic, superseded, and out-dated. 

This just in, Brainiac: The majority of the world seems to think that his career is "over."  The majority of the world seems to think that he "won’t win another major. " The majority of the world seems to think that he has "passed the torch" on to the “young, up-and-coming generation” of Rory McIlroys, Luke Donald's, Dustin Johnson, Hunter Mahan's, Rickey Fowler, and Anthony Kim's of the golf world.

People only talk about how he DIDN’T win AGAIN.  People talk about how he "may never win another major" and how the “new generation” of PGA professionals aren’t intimidated by Tiger Woods the way the rest of the Tour was from 1997-2009.

So, NO!!  I am not with the “rest of the world” on this.  I never gave up on him and I never will.  I stand alone.

And, YES, I am fully aware how you will sit anxiously waiting for him to not win another tourney with your hand eagerly resting on your phone only to call me and remind me that he didn’t win AGAIN.  I know you will.  The funny thing is: WHERE YOU GONNA BE WHEN HE DOES WIN AGAIN?  Where? EH?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Keep your phone close by because WHEN he does win…guess who will be the first to make the announcement to you? 

Don’t worry, pal.  I will be on you like white on rice on a paper plate in a bowl of milk in a Canadian snowstorm WRAPPED IN A SHEET…

FIN
___________________________________________________________________________________

Round and round we go…

So the former greatest golfer on earth is going to win another tourney in his life?  And then you’re going to tell me that he won?  Nice Cape, BUDDY!!!!  Maybe we should put the ole "FR" on the Cape for front runner.  How much golf did you watch LAST year?

Not much…”If Tiger isn’t good, then I’m going to be a baby and not watch golf, wah….so there, PGA”

So you don’t actually LIKE golf…which just makes you a front runner…ironically like “favorite teams, players, etc..” …. With the exception of the Cowboys…

Hey, in the 90’s..MJ retired and then played baseball and then came back to basketball, and I was like, “He’s still awesome at Basketball, and the world was like, NO”, but he was actually still great at basketball, and that year I ruled…

Plus – I DO enjoy the one round of "62" as the end-all-be-all evidence that he is back…small sampling.

Two guys on the Indians went 4 for 4 last night in a spring training game – World Series BABY!!!!!!!

Should I send my resume to your personal email acct., or do you have a “campaign email” account you’d like it sent to?

MonRoeInTheKnow@MonroeforPrezi.com  possibly?
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Dearest Mr. Ive had Just about Enough,

I am actually busy now, and I don’t have time to get "baited" into your arguments anymore.

However, I will simply state this:  when Tiger plays golf; I WATCH.  If he doesn’t play golf; I don’t watch.  I don’t like anyone else enough to watch.  It doesn’t matter how good or bad he plays; I watch.

When the Cowboys play; I watch.  It doesn’t matter if they win or lose…I watch.  Tiger and the Cowboys are my two favorite sports entities.  When they are on TV; I watch. Win or Lose; I watch.

I play golf myself; therefore, I actually DO like the sport of golf.  The difference is, if “my Tiger” isn’t playing I don’t watch because I am not a huge "fan" of anyone else.  There are guys I "like," but I don’t "like" them enough to spend my day watching them.

Lastly, 5 top 10 finishes in his last 6 starts; PLUS, his last round was a CAREER RECORD "62" on a day when conditions were POOR and the course average on that day was 72.  Since you’re a complete and utter idiot; let me break that down for you – that’s 10 STROKES BETTER THAN THE ENTIRE REST OF THE FIELD.  TEN STROKES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

…NOT A SMALL SAMPLING AT ALL, Brain!

FIN
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Dear Mr. SportsT4nk,

So a gold tourney is one round now?  Hmmm…I seem to remember someone telling me a different story a while back when Tiger was going to miss the cut of a major after day 1…”a golf tourney is a marathon.”

Funny how you just change all your mantras to suit whatever delusions of grandeur you have on a particular day…
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Dear Mr I think I Hear Your Mom Calling You,

I’m simply letting you know that he is on his way back.  I don’t think one round makes a tourney. 

The person we are talking about holds the PGA Tour record for being ranked #1 in the world for 281 weeks.  He was PGA Tour player of the year a record nine times.  He holds the record for being #1 on the money list 9 straight times.

Since his “transgressions,” he has lost the money list title, he has fallen FAR from the world #1 ranking, and he hasn’t won an official PGA Tour event since 2009.

I am simply trying to let you know that I see glimmers of the "Old Tiger."  The very same man that has won 14 majors - second only to the Golden Bear - hasnt won in 3 years;  all while badly tarninishing his image, losing his wife, losing sponsorships from MAJOR corporations, losing his $40 milllion home from divorce, losing his dignity and his ability to putt.

It’s exciting to see him working back to his old form and I am not bending/twisting/changing my stories/philosophies to fit my arguments.  I am not wavering from anything I have said in the past; I'm just simply letting you know that we are closer than ever to seeing the man we once knew.  The man who won 14 majors.  The man who held the world #1 ranking for a record 281 weeks.  The man who was PGATour POY a record 9 times.

That is all.  Please don’t misconstrue, misquote, nor misunderstand me. 

I can’t possibly be any clearer!

FIN
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Is that how far away Tiger is from being all the way “back”

Oh wait, he’s back, you said that on Saturday

Oh wait, he’s on his way back, you said that today…

I’m so confused now…honestly, it’s just exhausting deliberately aggravating you ALL day…I hope he just wins one so this can all be over…

Monroe for PRESIDENT!!!!!!!!!!!

The man who won 14 majors.  The man who held the world #1 ranking for a record 281 weeks.  The man who was PGATour POY a record 9 times. – So you’re saying he’s still good? ROTFL!!!!

I’m simply letting you know that he is on his way back – Nice, 12 emails ago HE WAS BACK….now he’s "on his way."  You’re in the wrong career, buddy – I should be watching to see how many electoral votes you were getting last night with the way you bob and weave, backtrack, & go forward…

Politics, buddy – that’s your calling…LMAO!!!!!

Love,
Your Future Campaign Mgr.
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Dear Mr. Im DONE.

GOOD BYE

......and FIN
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That’s truly disappointing, Mr. SportsT4nk…

I was going to try and interview to be your campaign manager….

IwannabepresidentandsodoI@MonroeforPrezi.com.org/TigerRules